Life can beat you down at times. I mean sis got some hands! She just is rude and disrespectful!
I know on here, you wonder how am I so confident and positive all the time. I want to share that I’m not always like that but IT IS OKAY! I’m human and I have my moments too.
Over the summer, I have dealt with trails and tribulations. I have been dealing with feeling less confident about myself because I often see other women on social media who are so gorgeous so beautiful. Here I am looking like a potato!
I had moments where I felt what is the point of speaking out about the issues that people with disabilities face because I felt no one listen. As soon as I see an abled bodied person does the same thing, they get praised for it me. As many people would wonder why am I upset because the issues are being talked about. It’s the fact that for many years, people with disabilities are ignored and told “it’s life” by abled bodied people. If an abled bodied person talked about those issues, the same abled bodied people who ignored the people with disabilities, will praise the abled bodied person.
It makes me question why am I even fighting because no one going to listen to me. My voice is ignored.
I questioned my life, my purpose, and even my existence. I got frustrated at times because I felt so stuck and had no answers for anything. Had gone to the point I felt the need to give up on myself, my dreams, and everything I believe in. Settle with the fact that maybe the people who bullied me, hurt me, and told me I’m aiming to high were right.
One day, I realized... I have to just keep rolling.
I had to keep rolling because I knew that this isn’t just it. Things are going to get better but I had to keep rolling. God wouldn’t just leave me in this situation because I’m not done living yet.
I kept rolling and when I did, my life slowly started to get better. I started to find myself again. I understand that the meaning of beauty is within self. Yes, looks maybe important in society but I have to know that I’m beautiful along with my flaws. Along with disability. I can still be beautiful even I see other beautiful women on social media or in public. We are our own kind of beautiful, and we should embrace. Not hide it.
I had to realize the reason I fight so much for disabled community is because for myself and others. I have a voice and I should use it for not only me but for someone who may not have a voice right now. I want to see better life for people with disabilities especially black people with disabilities. That’s why I created this blog to be a safe space for people with disabilities and anyone who deal with challenges in life because they have certain identities.
It wasn’t easy to just keep rolling especially with all that I was feeling but I knew better days were coming. I want to keep rolling so I can see them.
If you are in a situation, feel stuck, feel like settling, or just don’t know what to do, just keep rolling. Don’t just roll, but roll by faith, by trust, and by hope. Roll with positivity in heart and knowing that better days coming.
It will get better. You will find your answers to the questions you may ask in silence. You will find your way through.
Just keep rolling.